to dream or not to dream

https://www.flickr.com/photos/nicopierce/

Nicole Pierce – dreams and wishes – https://www.flickr.com/photos/nicopierce/

In a meditation today, I was ‘told’ something about dreams and desires which I would like to share. My Heart completely gets it. The logical mind is struggling to put it in words. I hope what I write will make sense.

We all have dreams. We all have desires. We are always in a quest to find ways to fulfil our dreams and desires – small or BIG. We plan things in our life so that we can bring our dreams and desires about.

We pray, we visualise, we say affirmations out loud, we do ‘manifestation meditations’, we do vision boards, we stick post-it notes on every available space in our house (and workplace too! Perhaps the only place left is our family members’ faces – i know, a bit of exaggeration), we hang ourselves upside down (maybe not), we scream, we shout, we cry, we try to feel in our bones skin muscles how it feels when our dreams come true, we try to stay positive, we falter, we doubt, we beat ourselves for wavering, we gather ourselves, we become desperate, we try to surrender to Higher Power (if we believe in one – if not, we may try to believe in a Greater Force just to fulfil our desire to eat an ice-cream), we stay the course!

In short (really? after so many words?) we do whichever trick our minds can think of so that our desires can be fulfilled, our dreams can come true.

Now, let’s pause for a second and step away from all or some of the above mentioned mental and physical activities that we put ourselves through. And think ‘What if the very reason I conceived a particular desire or dream is because the Universe knows I am capable of bringing this about!?! And no matter what I do or not do, the dream WILL BE realised’

Let’s take it a bit deeper and ask ourselves:

  • What if the only reason I am having this desire is because the fruition of it is already waiting for me up ahead?
  • What if my Higher Self gave me a thought for a particular desire, however BIG or small, which is in alignment with my Higher Purpose and It (my Higher Self) has not only devised a Plan for me to get there, but also already formulated a Guaranteed Success?
  • What if the realisation and success of a dream was also ‘installed’ (for the lack of a better word) in our own personal World/Life/Universe/Consciousness at the exact moment of it’s conception?
  • What if I got a desire because my Future Self is already basking in the fulfilment of it?
Hound Tor, Dartmoor

Hound Tor, Dartmoor

The analogy that I’d like to use is I like travelling. I want to go and see the Tors in Dartmoor in west country Devon (one of my favourite places btw). Tors must come into my awareness first for me to like them and have a wish to go see them. Most importantly, they HAVE TO already exist in the first place to come into my awareness.

So the object (or subject?) of the desire is already present at the time of having a desire, if it makes sense!

The only thing that remains then for me is deciding when and how do I want to go, and which route I want to take. From the moment of the inception of the desire, I lead myself toward it.

I reckon, and this is indeed a supposition, call it ‘thinking out loud’, our bigger radical dreams of a grander nature are somewhat similar to our desires like in the analogy above.

My ‘get’ from the meditation is that a dream in it’s manifested state already exists in a ‘future’ timeline. And the dream is brought into our awareness. We like it and decide to walk the timeline.

Our Higher Self, our All Knowing Eternal Soul already sees the dream, which starts in the non-physical, manifested in the physical plane. It knows we are indeed going to make it. And the reason why It planted a Seed of a dream in our minds in the first place is because It has already seen the Fruit grow. And from the moment of that seeding, It has already started us on our journey towards it. Again if we say yes to it.

Chances are we will say yes because our Higher Self knows what’s best for us (provided we step out of our ego mind)!

However, because we so identify ourselves with this third dimensional physical reality, unless we see a tangible evidence within the time frame we have set for it to occur, we doubt if we will ever make it. We begin to worry if we hit a stumbling block. We wonder if the path we have taken is indeed the correct one. We are so attached to the outcome and with the ego mind’s control of how it should be and how it should look like, we are for most part focussed on the destination and forget to enjoy the journey. 

But if we start taking this new perspective onboard that the very reason a desire or a dream takes a form in our awareness is because it’s actualisation has taken a form too in ‘future’ space and time, then our journey would be much easier, much more joyful, much more relaxed and our eyes wouldn’t always be on the destination. We would start appreciating the journey.

My car may break down whilst travelling to the Tors. But I will get it repaired and continue my journey since I know regardless of what happens on my journey, the object of my desire is already there and I will make it in due course.

We may be aware of some of the incidents that happen in our life, some actions we take, people we meet that contributes toward our dream. Some seemingly adverse conditions – we would wish them away. However, those are part of the Plan too. Nothing is working against us. In fact, everything is helping us evolve and bringing us closer to our realised dream(s).

All the things that we do or not do. All the affirmations we say or not say, all the visualisations we do or not do, all the vision boards we make or not – it doesn’t matter. Doing all these will get us to our destination. Not doing them will also get us there. I suppose the only ingredient required is we believe we WILL realise it and that everything that is happening (and that which is seemingly not happening) is taking us closer to our desired place.

I must admit I too have worried and doubted the actualisation of a ‘crazy’ dream that I am carrying within since few years. But this morning’s epiphany has a startling effect on me. In fact I am even grateful that the dream hasn’t materialised as yet because during this ‘waiting’ period, I have gotten and will get (until it’s time for it to ripen) abundance of opportunities to refine my smaller desires within the larger context of my main dream; I get ample of chances to redefine my priorities whilst I am on my way towards my destination.

And last but not the least, I perhaps wouldn’t have had this ‘weird perspective’ had my dream already manifested. I haven’t read any book on the subject but I would like to believe that there’s some Truth in what was revealed to me.

Friends, I’d love to hear what is your view on these thoughts that I have thrown out in open! I am well aware that my Truth may or may not be yours; nevertheless it would be great to hear different perspectives.

Till then keep dreamin’ and believing that the nitty-gritty will be taken care of (or already has been 😉 )

Update – 15.8.15 – The more I think about this ‘epiphany’ I had, the more it seems there’s Truth in it. At the very moment of the inception of a desire or dream in us by our Higher Self, a ‘point of success’ is also created so that we can move towards it. Without point B, how would we know where we have to go from point A? We have the choice of taking different routes from point A and depending on our choice, it will take however long (or quick) it takes. But point B HAS TO exist before we set out on our journey and to reach there our Higher Self gives us instruction on an on-going basis as part of the plan – provided we are NOT too stuck with our ego mind to listen to and/or identify the instructions!

let’s get naked 3

Three parts into this and we are still hell bent on stripping ourselves bare!?! Yep! This and this will tell you why. I suggest you read from the first part.

So as we can see, we can apply the same practice to any emotional discordance that we might be having, anything that we might be struggling with. It could be past hurts, painful memories, betrayal, resentment, dogs in the sky, birds in the water, fishes on the street, you name it!

The amazing thing is once we have experienced that which we need to for enough time or sat with it frequently enough or experienced it to the maximum degree \ intensity, it won’t carry enough charge. We still might get a thought related to the entity, but it won’t bother us. It will be a passing thought just like a passing cloud in a beautiful blue sky.

And the parameters (enough time, frequently enough, up to the required intensity) varies from person to person and how much heavy the charge is.

And as strange as it may sound, the wounds are healed and forgiveness happens – forgiving others but most importantly, ourselves. Keyword here is ‘happens‘; we don’t try to forgive by thinking our way through it or justifying our hurt and the reason for it but forgiveness very naturally and automatically happens.

Don’t worry, we won’t attract, via the famous Law of Attraction, more of such feelings in our life like the one we are experiencing during a meditation session. I don’t think LoA works like that. At least I have not attracted more of that which I was\am sitting with. Instead, I’ve shed many pounds off my emotional body and boy, it looks sexy!

Let’s face it: if we don’t confront and experience it, it is STILL there in our system, in our subconscious. And as we all know, our subconscious is million times more powerful than our conscious mind (a bit of exaggeration maybe) and it almost always wins. What are the results of it winning? We let those subconscious programming and beliefs to govern our lives and attract more of what we don’t want.

And that is why I am NOT a big fan of positive affirmations. Especially when we are just beginning on our spiritual path. To me, it seems so unreal, untrue, fake!

Here in my inner world, I’m carrying a hurt “my parents have wronged me” or a belief based in fear “I will not be successful” and out there, I’m barking “I am full of love for everyone” or “I am Tom Cruise” like a mad dog!! My subconscious is not going to believe the hogwash.

We need to start from where we are, not where we want to be!

OK, some might say positive affirmations help rewire the neural paths in our brains or whatever. However, to me that seems like it is going to take a LOT of convincing and cajoling on my part to my demons within. I’d rather calm them down by giving them space to do Zumba and then use positive affirmations once I’m empty of my garbage and baggage.

I’m not completely against affirmations. However, I’ve my own timeline as to when I can let them enter my world. That’s just me. For some, it might not be the case; they are effortlessly able to land in Honolulu the very next day they affirm “I’m in Bali” 😜

So, by sitting and letting that which has been suppressed, for lifetimes after lifetimes, out we are giving it a voice, an outlet to be released. We have been taught since our childhood by our parents, teachers, society not to express our so called ‘negative’ emotions and how should we behave and what should we be doing. Not any fault of their own. They were none the wiser.

Oh mate, I so hate this word ‘should’. We should not do this, should not say that, should not cry, should not be angry, should not ride a crocodile, should not kiss a kangaroo!

Once we start going deeper, we will see that there is nothing like positive or negative, good or bad, right or wrong. And that’s what we have to learn – to master. To accept and most most most importantly love all aspects of ourselves – all polarities.

And we can only love an aspect of ourselves if we are aware of it.

“You can only wipe the dust off something if you can see it.”  TWDY

One most important block whilst we sit for any type of meditation is our mind trying to distract us. It most definitely will start throwing myriads of thoughts at us. Or we will be reminded to make an important call. Or it will try to rationalise that the person who hurt us was not actually intending to.

Sure enough. The person didn’t mean us harm. But we are NOT that person. Our truth is we are hurt. Period. We acknowledge it and start our healing process. What, why, how, when of the other person is their business, not ours. Simple as that.

The mind doesn’t want us to experience anything because it’s survival is under threat!  It’s a master deceiver! It will want us to quit and move from the present moment in countless ways! That’s just the way the mind is.

Here mindfulness can be useful in that just acknowledge the thought from the ego mind and get back to our experiencing the feeling as quickly as possible. The only way is to persevere.

Persevere and give yourself the freedom to feel and express and strip the layers off of you. Believe me, once you have mastered this, you will only smile at things that used to piss you off. And you will be in a lot more happier space. True Happiness.

So then, the question is are you ready to get naked?

let’s get naked 2

Look here first to see why do we want to get naked.

Right! So, now that we have been authentic with our own self and we have decided to meditate, what should we do?

For me, meditation was NOT some choice, but more of a compulsion. Back then I was going through a lot of fear, rage, anger, irritation, lust, sadness, sorrow and the lot.  If there ever was a fearful miserable sod, it had to be me! So I didn’t have the ‘luxury’ to sit, meditate and connect with angels and fairies (I didn’t even know they existed, well, consciously didn’t know anyway)

So then, I put into practice what my Master had taught: “sit with the what-is”. And believe me, since last 15 years, I have ‘sat’ so much that my bums cry just at the thought of it. Sorry for being graphic!

It is a bit different to mindfulness. Mindfulness, I reckon, is being in the witness state and observing the thoughts when we meditate and bring ourselves back to being a witness if distracted, right? However, with the practice that I learnt, we actually let our emotions and feelings rise to the surface and experience it in as much intensity as is possible for us in the moment.

Let me explain. As we sit to meditate, we need to take an honest stock of what’s in there and how we are feeling in the moment. There must be at least one thing (most likely a person) in our current life period that’s pushing our buttons, that’s bugging us (unless we are living in Himalayas all alone. Well, even then, there will always be one mountain goat to ruffle our feathers! Bugger.)

Having said that, the most important thing to bear in mind is those who are pushing our buttons are NOT to be blamed. It’s NOT them who trigger something in us but they are only holding a mirror for us to see what we need to acknowledge, accept, heal and love within us; those qualities of ours we find it hard to accept and integrate.

“So, I can’t blame anyone?” No! “Seriously?” Yes. “Not even for like half a minute?” No. “Oh, bummer! I better keep that index finger in check then?!” Absolutely.

Fun fact: hence the meditation mudra (posture) of touching the index finger to our thumb.

Most often than not, as we sit, we will NOT have to go in search of a person, event or incident (let’s call any of this an entity) that’s driving us bonkers. It will automatically reveal itself. Just a thought of that entity is enough for us to start feeling the feeling(s)(fear, anger, hatred, resentment etc etc.)

So whatever feeling arises, we breathe into it. We don’t let it go. We hold it close, gently but firmly. We become acutely aware of it. We don’t judge or criticise or condemn or justify it. We experience it and let the intensity increase without budging. We give it space to open itself up and express itself.

As we do this, we might feel some sort of discomfort and sensations in our body. Maybe we are getting short of breath or we might start having pain somewhere in our body. In whatever form it gets represented, whatever it is, we stay with it.

We let the shortness of breath continue. We let the pain increase to such a degree that

WE BECOME THAT FEELING, THAT PAIN! WE BECOME ONE WITH THAT FEELING. So in essence, now we ARE NOT experiencing the feeling but we ARE that feeling. We don’t pay as much attention to thoughts now as to the feelings and sensations.

Let’s say we are working on fear, fear of losing our job for eg. So we let the fear rise. The thought of losing the job is real and so the fear (even though an illusion) is real for us in that moment. So instead of rationalising it or trying to be philosophical about it or trying to take our focus off it by shouting positive affirmations from the rooftops, we go right into the fear and confront it head-on! We face it.

“let the tiger eat you completely”  Shri Bhagavan

And as we go deeper in this, we might start getting more fear about other things. Fear of rejection. Fear of failure. Fear of owning our power. Fear of voicing our opinion. Fear of losing someone. Fear of death even! Do not stop it, let it continue. ‘The more the merrier’ if we really crave for freedom!

The thing to understand is fear is fear. The content (subject of the fear in our case) of the energy packet (the feeling) that we are sitting with may be different. But the common denominator is the same in all of them. Replace Fear A with Fear B and you still have Fear. So it’s not A or B that is an issue.

We need to bear in mind that the content is not important and our focus should be on the energy packet when we sit with it.

Another example: let’s say, we are feeling jealous of our friend or colleague (we can all relate to this, can’t we? ;)) So we start with that subject (person X) and dive deeper into the ocean of jealousy (oh, how very wonderful!! Not!!) And when we have stayed enough time with “being jealous of person X”, we will see, it will automatically bring into our awareness other people whom we feel jealous of.

Post is getting longer, let’s jump here